- Cockroaches
- Cottage cheese
- Weak coffee
- Saying goodbye
Lucky for me, the cold weather has sent the first into hibernation, the second only shows up as an ingredient in the occasional potluck lasagna, and the third has been all but eradicated by my handy-dandy Tervis to-go mug (thanks former BossMan!). As for #4, however, I've had more than my fill of it over the past few weeks.. and as much as this description will pain my sweet, never-at-a-loss-for-appropriate-words Scarlet O'Mamma, it has sucked. A lot.
**IMPORTANT side-note**
If you are one of the many people I feel like I failed at saying goodbye to in a way that appropriately honored the friendship we shared in Searcy, I am so sorry. It has absolutely nothing to do with you and what you mean to me. Change is something I don't have the greatest track record in dealing with as it is, and this was no exception. Please forgive me.. because I appreciate you and everything you meant to me more than I can put into words. For real.
Like I said, change isn't my strong suit. Whether it be paying a stranger to give me a drastically different 'do, deciding on what to cook for my first Thanksgiving dinner debut (more about that later in the post), or moving 500 miles further from home, the thought of branching out and taking a risk that could possibly end in disappointment for me (or even worse, for others that I love) fills me with unspeakable dread. Sure I can put on a good "I'm as cool as a cucumber/nothing phases me/I eat vulnerability for lunch/scared? b*tch please" act, but in all honesty, 90% of the time at the core my outlook on life mirrors the disciples' take on the storm in Mark 4, with my heart crying,
"Seriously Jesus? Don't you care if I drown? I mean, I know you said you wrote all of my days in your book before I was born, but are you sure you didn't skip over the past few months' worth of pages? And I totally accept that your ways are higher than my ways, but the altitude difference right now is getting a wee bit uncomfortable. Can you call your Dad in for a little heart-to-heart? I have a few suggestions for the Creator of the Universe."
(And if I'm smart enough to be listening, the response I get is never the one I'm looking for. Because He really does know what He's doing, and He knows I often act dumber than the dust He created me from.)
So as G-Day approaches (aka moving-to-Georgia Day) the doubts have been swiftly mounting.
What if this isn't the right thing to do?
What if I fail miserably again?
What if I don't find a job?
What if I can't handle the school workload?
What if I don't make any friends?
What if this being ordained by You, Lord, was all in my head?
WHAT IF MY NEW APARTMENT IS FILLED WITH COTTAGE-CHEESE EATING COCKROACHES THAT ONLY ALLOW ME TO MAKE WEAK COFFEE AND CONFISCATE MY TERVIS TUMBLER??!!??
You get the picture.
But today as I was sitting here reeling from goodbye #4723, drowning my sorrows in a bowl full of Christmas Cookie-flavored ice cream (highly recommended.. you should try it ASAP) and a mega Pinterest binge, I began to realize how un-reliant I have been on the Lord and all He's done to make this possible. I've been dwelling on the negative aspects of the past month and failing to glorify Him in the numerous blessings He's
- A family (biological and spiritual) that has been nothing short of supportive throughout everything I've set my mind to do recently.
- Wonderful coworkers that sacrificed time, money, and lots of love to throw me a surprise going away party on my last day at work.
- Goodbye notes/Facebook messages/texts/etc. from precious friends filled with encouragement, love, and other tear-inducing sentiments acknowledging how much I meant to them during the past few years (which pales so much in comparison to how much they meant to me).
- A chance to catch up with my BESTfriend KJC and awesome parents for the next month while I'm temporarily stationed in TX.
- Having that S.B.o.M (Sweet Boy of Mine) come to Abilene to visit for the week of Thanksgiving.
- A healthy mind and body.
- A roof over my head, food in my belly, clothes on my back, and love in my heart both now and when I move.
- The opportunity to share Thanksgiving dinner with a great group of my wonderful relatives.
- New Years plans with my fabulously wild and crazy aunts, uncles, and cousins at a lodge on the Mississippi river
- A freaking spectacular flend and her new hubs that I get to look forward to
stalkinghanging out with when I get to Gainesville
..and SO MUCH MORE!
Thank you, Lord
Thank you
Thank you
Thank you
Funny how all that worry seems to dissipate as the goodness of what He's blessed me with is magnified.
"He got up, rebuked the wind and said to the waves, 'Quiet! Be still!' Then the wind died down and it was completely calm"
That verse reference brings this song to mind- Strong Enough to Save by Tenth Avenue North. The chorus' lyrics fit so perfectly with Mark 4, and in my humble opinion you can never go wrong with anything done by T.A.N. They're magnificent.
The One the wind and waves obey is strong enough to save
And because I know you're dying to creep what's been going on in my super-exciting life for the past month, I'll leave you with a few pics. Enjoy!
I mentioned my awesome coworkers and the surprise going away party they threw for me before I left:
Surprise! Great job hiding it, guys :) |
Yummy cake.. They're too wonderful |
My favorite party photog/office co-conspirator/kick-ass journalist (who can be found in all her glory here) |
Then there was that one last visit to see Arkansas' beautiful outdoors with that SBoM:
The location |
Ready for the hike (or 2 minutes of walking uphill that made me sore for days. I need to work out) |
Beside one of the Caverns. Thank you, camera self-timer |
Perfect end to a perfect day.. I'm definitely going to miss this! |
Now that I'm home with a lot of time on my hands I've decided to embrace the inner domesticity lurking somewhere way below my surface by actually cooking some of the stuff I drool over on Pinterest. My saintly parents have dutifully eaten everything I've subjected them to, and as far as I know no one's had to pay their dues to the porcelein gods yet (or they've just decided to humor me for another month).
I've used this little beauty often. One just like it has shamelessly been put on the top of my Christmas list |
Hello homemade apple confit (whatever the heck that is. All I know is that it was good) |
Then I branched out and made this. Not my best attempt. It tasted as weird as the combination of ingredients look |
Along with the weird mac-n-ugly pictured above I attempted to channel the infamous Pioneer Woman. It was great except for the fact that the recipe I used failed to mention that this beauty was Now for my pride and joy-the Pecan Pie. Ignore the broken freezer-burnt pie shell and 5-year old corn syrup. It was prettydarngood y'all. I nice little replica ended up being one of my few successful first-ever contributions to the Hughes family's Thanksgiving get together. SCORE! Along with time with Abilene fam numero uno, I have LOVED getting to hang my with familia-dos (I practically lived with these people during high school. They're heaven-sent in every sense of the word), especially the newest two. I may not be their favorite aunt (I'll give that title to you, KJC), but I'm proud to be considered #2. And for all of you that know my wild and crazy brudda, you understand me when I say that this may be my only opportunity. Just sayin' |
Look at this cutie.. watch out ladies- he's legal in 16 short years! |
Yes, I always have this effect on children. She loves me And last but certainly not least- Thanksgiving! Unfortunately there aren't any pictures from the actual day because some doofus brought the camera with no memory card in it (whoops.. sorry Scarlet O'Mamma! You wondered why we peaced out so quickly after eating), but I did have a very special visitor come down all the way from Arkansas for the week. Uncharacteristically of me, not many pictures were taken, but here are just a few: Again, thanks camera self-timer! Please ignore the no-make up/baggy sweat pants/rogue piece of bang-in-the-face look. I like to think it's more as"effortless" than "lazy", but who are we kidding here? (at least he's good-lookin') And he can cook! I think I'll keep him around ;) Shh.. don't tell Scarlet O'Mamma (again, good thing he's good lookin' because there's not much but BSC on this end) This Pin-spired decoration + sweet flower + really dang cold night = impromptu living room picnic. Success! |